Explorer's Space Diplomacy Signing
THE FOLLOWING INFORMATION IS CLASSIFIED. INTERACTION WITH HUMANS IS INVOLVED. DO NOT SHARE WITH ANYONE OR WE WILL FORCE YOU TO WATCH THE WHAT MOVIE FOR TWENTY FOUR HOURS. The Ratification of the Outer Space Treaty between NASA and PASA was a classified diplomacy summit between the National Aereonautics and Space Administration and the Penguin Aerodynamics and Space Agency, performed to stop the aliens from interfering with USA space development. Keep it secret, humans are involved! The event After PASA shot down an "alien" satillite, they recieved a message to sign an extisting anti-weapon treaty with the rest of the "world" (weird) banning all use of weaponry in space so that it can "benefit mankind". It seemed to involve a Sanity Human named Christopher Scolese... and Explorer. ---- Dialouge Transcript The two creatures walk in and shake extremities. Chris: Hello, and wel- ...why are you in a penguin costume? Is this some sort of joke? Explorer: PASA enjoys putting merriment into the normal stress of spaceflight. Christopher nods. Chris: So, before you sit down, tell me, why have we not heard of you before? Your spacecraft technology is incredible! Explorer thinks for a moment. Explorer: We were a private agency for a while. Chris: ...funded by? Explorer: (changing subject) LOOK! a cubewano! Chris: WHERE? Explorer: Made ya look! Chris: (annoyed) Okay, now tell me your name. Explorer: Explorer Freddell Antics CLXIX. Chris: Your real first name, Mister Antics. Explorer: My first name is Explorer. People have weird names sometimes, isn't that right, Mister Scolese? Chris: Understood. Please take a seat where you can sign the Treaty. Christopher and Explorer sit down. PPPPPPFFFFFFFFF! Explorer is struggling to restrain his laughter. Chris: (frustrated) Mister Antics, why did you place a whoopee cushion in my chair? Explorer is still trying to restrain his laughter. Explorer: (between giggling) It lightens up the mood of a diplomatic event. I do it to everyone. Chris: (adjusts himself in the seat) Okay. Whatever. Now, by signing this (pffff) treaty (pffff), you will declare that your space agency will not use any sort of weaponry, nu-(pffff)-clear or otherwise. Is that understood, Mister Antics? (pffff) Explorer is still laughing because the Whoopee Cushion is not fully deflated and is making noise. Chris: MISTER ANTICS? Explorer perks up. Chris: Just read the treaty. Explorer reads the treaty. Explorer: No nukes. No shooting. Got it. We live by that policy where I come from. Chris nods and takes back the treaty for a final review. Explorer, meanwhile, preens his feathers. Christopher notices. Chris: (very annoyed) Mister Antics, I understand your penguin costume is for humor's sake, but is pretending to preen your feathers really necessary? Explorer stops. Explorer: Okay, I'll stop preening my feathers (which, by the way, are very real--but why am I talking in parentheses here?!). Just give me the treaty! Chris does so. Explorer signs the treaty with his full name, but writes "n00b" in octal-code under it. Explorer: There. Chris and Explorer stand up and shake extremities. Chris: As a full member of the OST, we will now respect your airspace and configure our and our members' satillites not to interfere with your comunications... unless you are stationed in Antarctica. That's illegal according to the Antarctic Preservation Treaty of 1913. Explorer perks up. He's heard that name before. Explorer: Repeat that? Chris: The Antarctic Preservation Treaty of 1913. The one that says that we, as humans, can not enter Antarctica and disturb its primitive wildlife? Explorer took offense to calling penguins "primitive". Explorer: Hey! Who are you calling primitive? (annoyed) Just because you have oppsoable thumbs does not mean they are better than penguins! Chris: Mister Antics, please! They're just flightless birds! Calm down! Seriously, you are taking the costume thing way too far! Explorer: I happen to like the penguins, thank you. That's why I'm "wearing" this. I kind of wonder, if penguins could "understand" what you are saying, would they take offense to your statement? Chris: They're just simple animals. Explorer: WHAT?! (he catches himself before becoming spastic and/or taking out a shovel) -...um, yeah... (minorly upset) ...just... animals. Chris: Well, Antarctic creatures aside, I believe we are through here. Mister Antics, next time, should we ever meet again, please don't wear that stupid penguin costume. It's really unprofessional. Explorer rolls his eyes. The two exit the room. Christopher quickly seals the Treaty to prevent damage to it, and making sure it is secured, Christopher takes the right door, Explorer takes the left. Explorer smirks as he boards the plane that is heading home. SPALSH! A bucket of ice water fell upon Christopher. He screamed. Chris is now dripping wet. Everything on him is drenched, except for the Treaty. Christopher: (picking up a phone) Jaque of the European Space Agency, whatever you do, do not ask for a meeting with the PASA ambassador. Trust me... although, they are suspicious. Keep an eye out for them. ---- Result The leader of a master corporation got pranked (twice), and PASA pledged to never use nukes or weaponry in space (not like it was in the first place. Other than suspicions on Explorer's identity, Antarctica is in the clear... until they started using nukes in space. What could possibly go wrong? See also *PASA *Explorer *Humans External links * NASA * Christopher Scolese * Outer Space Treaty Category:Stories Category:Stuff that breaks the 4th wall Category:space Category:diplomacy